A few short and funny news

Car Phone

A woman was reporting her car as stolen, and mentioned
that there was a car phone in it. The policeman taking
the report called the phone and told the guy that answered
that he had read the ad in the newspaper and wanted to buy
the car. They arranged to meet, and the thief was arrested.

Put Your Foot In Your Mouth

Employed by the human-development center of a corporation in the
midwest, my friend trains employees in proper dress codes and etiquette.

One day as she was stepping onto the elevator, a man casually dressed in
jeans and a golf shirt got on with her.

Thinking of her responsibilities, she scolded, "Dressed a little
casually today, aren't we?"

The man replied, "That's one benefit of owning the company..."

Oil Change

45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas,
after a mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of
marijuana were packed in the engine compartment of the car
which she had brought to the mechanic for an oil change.
According to police, Brasher later said that she didn't
realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to
change the oil.

The Lottery

Californian Bill Helko was thrilled when he had the winning numbers
in the local lottery, the first prize being $412,000.

He straight away went and ordered a Porsche, booked a family holiday
in Hawaii and had a champagne dinner with his wife and friends at an
expensive Hollywood restaurant.

When he went to pick up the winnings he found that 9,097 others had
also won first prize and his share of the jackpot was $45.

The Perfect Scam - Australia

Australian Police have been unable to recommend a prosecution for the following scam:

A company takes out a newspaper advertisement claiming to be able to supply imported hard core pornographic videos. As their prices seem reasonable, people place orders and make payments via check.

After several weeks, the company writes back explaining that under the present law they are unable to supply the materials and do not wish to be prosecuted. So they return their customers' money in the form of a company check.

However, due to the name of the company, few people will present
these checks to their banks. The name of the company:
"The Anal Sex and Fetish Perversion Company."